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CRUISING WITH CORONA: Corona Knows Halloween Clothes

October 26, 2010

I asked my sweet grandmother who I should go as for Halloween this year.

“Go as one of the Wizard of Oz characters, mijo, you would look cute as the lion or the tin man or the scarecrow.”

After pondering her suggestion, “I would, grandma, but you look like the Wicked Witch of the East and I would have to kill you if I dressed like that.”

“Oh.”

“Any other suggestions?”

“Go as a priest.  I always wished you were a priest.”

After some thought… “I would, grandma, but then I’d have to perform an exorcism on you to get all those nasty demons that speak horrific, broken English out of you and Halloween is Saturday…ain’t enough time to get all them monsters out of you by then.  I’m gonna need a whole month working overtime and weekends to finish the job and to bury the ones who begged to go back to hell who couldn’t take you and died in you…I’ll miss Halloween.”

“Oh.”

“Any other ideas?”

“What about an Olympic sprint champion?  You love sports.”

That made me smile, but then I lost the smile, “I would, grandma, but then I’d collect too much candy running that fast and your gordita a$$ don’t need no extra sweets, trust me.  I mean that respectfully, my little fatso.”

“Oh, okay.”

“Why don’t I just go as the nice person that I am.”

“And how do you dress for that, mijo?”

It finally hit me, “In the suit you’re gonna buy me!”

“We won’t be able to eat if I do that.”

“You can stand to lose some weight, remember?  I knew you’d know how to dress me, grandma!  I love you!”

Corona

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