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September 20, 2010

I saw this mean, hungry pit bull running down my block with its owner right behind him.

I immediately painted my mother-in-law like a pork chop.

The pit spotted her and salivated.

My mother-in-law runs hecka slow so the pit caught up to her and bit into her…CHOMP!

He immediately spit her out and made a sour face.

“Don’t he like porks chops?” I asked the owner.

“It’s not that.  It’s that my pit hadn’t seen she looks like a dog.  And my pit ain’t no cannibal.”

I immediately painted her face and her body like a bone.

CHOMP!  The pit bit into her chest.

He immediately spit her out and shivered.

“What now?”

“She has a cold heart.”

I painted her like a mailman.

CHOMP!  He bit into her, spit her out and coughed.

“Now what?”

“You should’n’a drew the mace can.  He bit into the mace.”

I wiped her clean…I gave up.

CHOMP!  He bit into her…ate her up.

“Wow, he likes regular people?”

“Nah, he loves old boots, they’re his favorite.”


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